Jesus, son of God

It's a broad motherfuckin' church man.

Well I'm a fan of sandals and I'm also a fan of keepin' it real. But if these cats were outside my office everyday, I don't know what I'd do. I guess I'd be heading to the water cooler regularly and doin' my water into wine party trick.

Dad's busy in Africa. What's up?

Elastoplast. Lots of it.

CaptainFez said 33 minutes ago: I'd really like it if Jesus makes the next M&N newsletter.

Danny banned me from the mailing list. I'd tell Dad to smite him but he'd just tell me to grow up.

I know Abraham, well I know his son and he and I have the same father issues.

He can, but he makes me go down and lift it.

Guess who has to take the bins out?

Dad can't have that anymore, his arteries are fucked.

For later perusal.

THE LEMONHEADS It's About Time (Warner)
BECK Black Tambourine (Universal)
12:00am
MIKE WATT Big Train (Sony)
OK GO Get Over It (EMI)
ELASTICA Connection (Universal)
BLUR Popscene (EMI)
AC/DC It's A Long Way To The Top (Albert Productions)
PINEAPPLES FROM THE DAWN OF TIME Too Much Acid (Independent)
PLUG UGLIES Dipsomania (Independent)
BOB LOG III Boob Scotch (Shock)
ALABAMA 3 Ain't Goin' To Goa (Virgin)
12:30am
CHRIS ISAAK Wicked Game (Warner)
AMY WINEHOUSE In My Bed (Universal)
ADAM GREEN Jessica (Spunk/Inertia)
AMERICAN MUSIC CLUB Johnny Mathis' Feet (Virgin)
BRIAN JONESTOWN MASSACRE When Jokers Attack (Independent)
SOUL COUGHING Screenwriter's Blues (Mushroom)
SNEEZE Shaky Ground (Half A Cow)
PAVEMENT Stereo (Shock)
1:00am
FRANK BLACK Hang On To Your Ego (Independent)
ETHYL MEATPLOW Devil's Johnson (Fest/Mush)
THE EURYTHMICS Shame (SBME)
THE BELOVED Hello (Warner)
LES RYTHMES DIGITALES Sometimes (Virgin)
THE B-52's Channel Z (Warner)
FISCHER Z Perfect Day (BMG)
KIRSTY MacCOLL He's On The Beach (Virgin)
1:30am
FEIST Inside & Out (Universal)
WEIRD AL YANKOVIC Smells Like Nirvana (Mercury)
JON SPENCER BLUES EXPLOSION Wail (Shock)
RUSSELL SIMINS I'm Not A Model (EMI)
SMASHING PUMPKINS Zero (Virgin)
MOTHER LOVE BONE Stardog Champion (Polydor)
PEARL JAM Go (Sony)
KORN A.D.I.D.A.S. (Sony)
2:00am
BUSH Everything Zen (Universal (MCA))
STONE TEMPLE PILOTS Vasoline (Warner)
ANDY PRIEBOY Tomorrow Wendy (Mushroom)
CONCRETE BLONDE Bloodletting (EMI)
THE HEADS Damage I've Done (Mercury)
DEPECHE MODE In Your Room (Mushroom)
TRICKY Overcome (Mercury)
SHANE MacGOWAN and SINEAD O'CONNOR Haunted (Warner)
2:30am
KRISTIN HERSH & MICHAEL STIPE Your Ghost (Shock)
SPARKLEHORSE Box Of Stars (MDS)
THE THE Gravitate To Me (SBME)
BLACK BOX RECORDER Child Psychology (EMI)
BABYBIRD Bad Old Man (Mushroom)
EMF I Believe (EMI)
SOUND 5 Ala Kaboo (Festival)
JACKNIFE LEE Bursting Off The Back Beat (Festival)
3:00am
THE BEAUTIFUL SOUTH Perfect Ten (Mercury)
THE ALL SEEING I featuring TONY CHRISTIE Walk Like A Panther (Polydor)
MINT ROYALE featuring LAUREN LAVERNE Don't Falter (Shock)
DE LA SOUL Ego Trippin' - Part 2 (Fest/Mush)
THE PHARCYDE 4 Better Or 4 Worse (Warner)
POSITIVE K I Got A Man (Mercury)
DIGITAL UNDERGROUND Kiss U Back (Mushroom)
MISSY ELLIOTT Hot Boyz (Warner)
3:30am
WHAM Young Guns (Go For It) (Sony)
PECCADILLO Julian (Independent)
MORRISSEY The Last Of The Famous International Playboys (EMI)
FRANKIE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD Two Tribes (Warner)
FOX S-S-Single Bed (Polydor)
VOICE OF THE BEEHIVE I Walk The Earth (Polydor)
WALL OF VOODOO Far Side Of Crazy (Sony)
4:00am
THOMAS DOLBY Airhead (EMI)
PETE WYLIE featuring THE FABULOUS JOSIE JONES Diamond Girl (Virgin)
KATE BUSH Rubberband Girl (EMI)
STEPHEN DUFFY Kiss Me (Virgin)
POP WILL EAT ITSELF Bulletproof (BMG)
RENEGADE SOUNDWAVE Probably A Robbery (Mushroom)
LOU REED The Original Wrapper (BMG)
4:30am
DIED PRETTY Sweetheart (Festival)
MENTAL AS ANYTHING Apocalypso (Festival)
HOODOO GURUS I Want You Back (BMG)
PAINTERS & DOCKERS Nude School (Mushroom)
THE CRUEL SEA Fangin' Hoons (Polydor)
OXIDE & NEUTRINO Bound 4 Da Reload (Warner)
DAVID BOWIE Little Wonder (BMG)
PNAU Discone (Creative Vibes)
5:00am
THE ORB Perpetual Dawn (Polygram)
APHEX TWIN Donkey Rhubarb (Warner)
FUTURE SOUND OF LONDON We Have Explosive (Virgin)
TELEMETRY ORCHESTRA Swingers International (Independent)
THE 5,000 FINGERS OF DR. T The Butt Squeezing Factory (Independent)
SNEAKY SOUND SYSTEM Hip Hip Hooray (Independent)
MALCOLM McLAREN Zulus On A Timebomb (Sony)
JC-001 Never Again (Warner)
5:30am
MC 900ft JESUS with DJ ZERO Truth Is Out Of Style (Festival)
3RD BASS Pop Goes The Weasel (Universal)
PRIMAL SCREAM Jailbird (Chemical Brothers remix) (Sony)
DEF LEPPARD Rocket (Polydor)
TALK TALK Talk Talk (EMI)
THE JAM News Of The World (Polydor)
TEARS FOR FEARS Mad World (Polydor)

Dad's insufferable at the moment. So's Mum.