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docklands - help find a cure.

juicenewton*  said about 5 years ago  or at  10:54AM on Tuesday, February 3 2009 in competitions

It really doesn't matter how much they charge for apartments, or if they get a new shopping district (Costco? eeewww!), the whole place is a souless example of anti-design and town planning by new- money developers.

I had the misfortune to meet up someone who works down there and because it was 44 degrees proceeded to the closest bar called The Lounge (?) populated by future cast members of Underbelly pt. 3 (tribal sleeve tatts & throwing their keys to bar staff to move their v. expensive cars) and poor intl tourists who thought it was Melbourne.

What's the cure? Make it public housing for 30 years and let it go to the dogs, artists, homeless- ripe for revitalisation later on?


Ken Fucking Kunnington  said about 5 years ago:

could you not go there anymore?


juicenewton*  said about 5 years ago:

But it's such a blight, it makes Marvellous Melbourne less so.


fishandfingerpie  said about 5 years ago:

Turn it into a minimum-security prison.


feralmedia  said about 5 years ago:

I hear they're trying to breed a super race down there.


feralmedia  said about 5 years ago:

(Completely hairless; bronzed.)


k2  said about 5 years ago:

That area definately needs some low to medium cost housing for a start. The developers need to stop pretending that it's Darling Harbour - we are not fucking Sydney, that shit wont stand here. We dont have the number of tourists willing to throw money at semi-shit restaurants just because they serve fish and are on the water.

They need to bulldoze that big tent thing, the giant tv screens, the southern star, and all the shops around the southern star.

They need to allow for the area to grow organically - the area around the studios would be full off inner-city hipsters if there were converted warehouse buildings, or more interesting / affordable housing than fucking ugly high-rise shoebox living.

Docklands needs more Kensington / Footscray / Yarraville and less Darling Harbour.


fishandfingerpie  said about 5 years ago:

(Completely hairless; bronzed.)

Super race? Bah. I like my translucent jellyfish body and sporadic clumps of hair just fine, thank you very much.


tangy_zizzle  said about 5 years ago:

Build an opera house and a great big bridge.


gardenia  said about 5 years ago:

its melbourne, its a shitty country town at the arse-end of the world trying to big-note itself. suffer in your afl jocks you inbred hicks.


Ken Fucking Kunnington  said about 5 years ago:

marvellous melbourne could use a few more cultural stains.


needlestrasse  said about 5 years ago:

Once again, gardenia performing his witty repertoire. Never gets old, does it?


fishandfingerpie  said about 5 years ago:

especially cos I used to wear AFL jocks when I was a kid.


de.foxus  said about 5 years ago:

The developers need to stop pretending that it's Darling Harbour


even darling harbour is soulless, docklands just takes it even further.


juicenewton*  said about 5 years ago:

Would have been easy for you to hide the skiddies fishandfinger, although Hawthorn jocks would be the best at that.


outerspacextrapnel  said about 5 years ago:

Turn it into a Running Man style murder stadium.


fishandfingerpie  said about 5 years ago:

Would have been easy for you to hide the skiddies fishandfinger, although Hawthorn jocks would be the best at that.

I had Richmond ones, so I pretty much shat myself all the time because we lose so damn much. Nothing hides that. The only thing that got the stains out were tears.


JRB  said about 5 years ago:

If you're going to promote an area as a premium shopping centre than have premium shops - not discount outlets. You also need unique products - there was nothing for sale at Docklands that I couldn't buy in Shepparton.


feralmedia  said about 5 years ago:

The timing's not right for a premium-focussed precinct such as Docklands. It needs more genuinely compelling entertainment options that couldn't be found in any other inner-South nightlife district. It wastes its waterfront positioning somewhat, and lacks casual, non-commercial spaces for recreation. I think there's potential for it to improve, but it's a bit weird starting a new suburb from the top down.


juicenewton*  said about 5 years ago:

I'm sick of shopping and scoffing being the only 'recreational' pursuits catered for.

Where is the jumping castle? The Totem tennis courts? The croquet lawn? The Speakers corner? the chess park?

contemplates running for Mayor


FrankieTeardrop  said about 5 years ago:

Wait for the area to become a proper slum / ghost town, then convert some of the derelict buildings into cheap artists' studios.


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hungryhungryhippo  said about 2 years ago:

Fucken big boat on fire out the front of ANZ


hungryhungryhippo  said about 2 years ago:

Maybe it's Clive or Gina's.


Davel  said about 2 years ago:

Rising sea levels should take care of it nicely.

Did you hear how some of the blocks in the docklands went for 1 to $200 000?

Scam or what?


juicenewton*  said about 2 years ago:

Maybe it's Clive or Gina's

Obviously the CIA didn't like being outed for their conspiracy with Greenpeace and sent a black ops team down to docklands.


Maximum Sincere  said about 2 years ago:

It was the same one they used in their plot with Greenpeace to frame the French for Rainbow Warrior.

lowers venetian blind with finger, looks outside


Davel  said about 2 years ago:

X post- the rising sea level will take care of the docklands.

Who would want to live next to the stinky yarra/open drain?


hungryhungryhippo  said about 2 years ago:

Think there's a bomb threat - road blocked with cop cars and one of those robot cameras checking out a vehicle.


Coz  said about 2 years ago:


electricsound  said about 2 years ago:


anok  said about 2 years ago:

dumbos.


hungryhungryhippo  said about 11 months ago:

Holy shit. I just revisited that korean place cafe de kikaku. Absolutely incredible Bao. Hadnt been there for ages and the menu is looking good. Not a super cheap option but definitely value for money.


black wasp!  said about 11 months ago:

Has anyone been to the art spaces and general Docklands Spaces projects in Harbourtown/Waterfront City?


kazpatafta  said about 9 months ago:

My work is moving to Docklands next week (before you send commiserations it's moving from Broadmeadows so total step up). Coffee, lunch etc. recommendations please!


pollyphonic  said about 9 months ago:

Banoi on Bourke Street (across from the NAB at 800) is fantastic!


hungryhungryhippo  said about 9 months ago:

That korean joint is now called supermax. Still good. The pulled pork sandwich at Story (almost adjacent to Nab at 700 Bourke on the concourse) is also superb.


JRB  said about 9 months ago:

The pulled pork sandwich at Story (almost adjacent to Nab at 700 Bourke on the concourse) is also superb.

That's tomorrow's lunch sorted. THANKS!


Haff  said about 9 months ago:

Vermicelli salad with spring rolls at vintam bakery is my favourite lunch in docklands. Banoi is good but always so busy.

My preferred coffee place is edamama.


anonymous  said about 9 months ago:

Depends what part of docklands you're in, around southern cross is reasonable these days.


kazpatafta  said about 9 months ago:

Thanks, Docklands massive. Down the Southern end, maybe I'll go try out these famed Merrywell burgers


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