You got nothing, huh?

I think you have to go out with someone before you can contribute ideas on the topic.

start a thread about it on M+N and hope they catch on - obviously!

just throw out the sock puppet, ducky

Welcome to Dumpsville. Population YOU!

Flee the country.

If Reid has someone to break up with, then he's pretty good at keeping secrets.

Welcome to Dumpsville. Population YOU!

nah, i live there too

Nah, he's going about it the right way, think about how you're going to finish it before you start it.

Eyes on the prize and all that.

Spoken like a true partner, loki. I salute you.

fuck someone else. that'll usually do it....

Just slip out the back, jack
Make a new plan, stan
You dont need to be coy, roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, gus
You dont need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, lee
And get yourself free

Say 'You're dumped if you say what' real quick and when she says what you cheese it.

Switch the button.

you're dumped beer. i read in the paper that some guy proposed to his wife via personalised beer... so why not end it that way. sure its impersonal, but you get a case in which to curse the absolute fuckedness of the person dumping you. get drunk with friends, start getting over it.

http://beerbuilder.brewtopia.com.au/

There must be lots of these types of merchandising around. What do you do with a desperate dan?

Join him up for bondage sessions at your local Black Market and film it.

erm... just fucking tell them.

or dont - and paulie g will come getcha!

start a thread about it on M+N and hope they catch on - obviously!

it's been done before.

blue budgey will teach em some tricks.

erm... just fucking tell them.

not humiliating enough.

''I'm breaking up with you because I'm dying of cancer, and I want to spread HPV before I go.... cheers!''

i believe it.

no, i mean, someone has actually done that.

Shit. That's rather unpleasant.

Send a card outlining your intention to die after falling ill with limp lip.

I got the text message break up once... while I was on the tram over to their place.

Ouch.

yikes!

buy ad space on mess+noise.

oh man there is nothing worst than a dumpee! and how shit is it when they threatan suicide

Thetan suicide!

suicide? that's a bit rich innit?

ha.. imagine a sweet flash banner ad on here? or even one of those little shit ones on Facebook.

Make it look like one of those ''punch the monkey and win 10 bucks!'' flash banners, but instead it reads ''punch the monkey or die miserable and alone!''

Facebook status update?

nah...facebook application.

You've been invited...

You've been invited... to dumpsville!

so anyway.... kick that fucker to the curb girfrien. mmm hmm

just do it like a band-aid..... right off....

A Marine stationed in Iraq recently received a ''Dear John'' letter from his girlfriend back home. It read as follows:

Dear Ricky,

I can no longer continue our relationship. The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us. I'm sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent to you.

Love, Becky

The Marine, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow Marines for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex-girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc. In addition to the picture of Becky, Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies.

There were 57 photos in that envelope....along with this note:

Dear Becky,

I'm so sorry, but I can't quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me.